Asking Permission | Gift Exchange Ideas

Nov 18, 2012 by April    1 Comment     Posted under: Gift Exchange Ideas

Some gift exchange ideas require asking permission, whether you realize it or not.

I remember when my boys were younger, my father-in-law would tease me every December that he was giving the boys drums.

After the first year of worrying if he was really serious, I came up with a response that left him wondering as well:

Great! They’ll love coming to your house to play with them! Because that is where they will stay

Needless to say, he never followed through on gifting the drums.

That fun exchange made me realize though, the importance of asking permission for certain types of gifts.

Asking permission before you give:

• expensive tech
• loud drums
• vacation packages

While these all seem like great gift exchange ideas, there is a level of commitment that comes from owning such items.

A grandparent may feel they are being helpful by giving a 13-year-old a laptop, but Mom & Dad may feel conflicted in such a gesture.

By asking permission from the parents, the gift giver is expressing a level of respect for the rules of the home as well as opening up a conversation about the issues surrounding teenagers on the internet today and whether or not that is why the child doesn’t already own a personal computer.

With a vacation package gift, the recipient would need to get things in order in an effort to be away from home for vacation.

Now, don’t get me wrong. These are all spectacular gift exchange ideas … if you’re asking permission before giving them. Remember, it’s the thought that counts ~ including the thought of “will this burden them in any way?”

Asking permission and keeping the surprise

Communication can be lost in the the spirit of giving. You want to surprise your parents with the dream vacation but now you’re realizing all the preparation that will need to take place. How do you keep it a secret until the bow is untied?

• wrap a pamphlet about the destination, then include a note that explains “all expenses paid when you’re ready to book”

or

You’re the relative, getting ready to purchase the drum set. Become a bit of an investigator. Ask key questions like

• if Johnny wanted drums, would you seriously let him have them?
• where would a drum set fit in your home / his bedroom?
• are you making Johnny save up for his own drum set because you’re hoping he’ll lose interest before the goal is met or are you just trying to teach him financial skills?

Sure, the seasoned parent is going to see you coming a mile away {well, maybe} but at least you’re not showing up with a gift that just made someone think “uh-oh”.

Interested in joining the conversation? Comment below, or over on The Mental Clutter Coach Facebook Page …

What do you think about asking permission before you give a gift?

Got anything to say? Go ahead and leave a comment!