Weekly Challenge :: Self Assessment | Shopping Habits

In the weekly challenge I hope to push you a little beyond your comfort zone, ask you to consider new perspectives, this week is no different ~ time to take a look at the self assessment.

Don’t worry, this isn’t the type of self assessment that tells you what “type” you are or that you require further professional help. Nope, this self assessment is actually more difficult than that. This one … is really a solitary exercise, consider it the ultimate reality check – with your self.

Last week’s challenge was all about Start at the Beginning, figuring out what your world could look like with improved shopping habits. Taking stock of the clutter that already surrounds you and evaluating “how did that happen”. This week we’re diving into what you can do differently, from here forward. How to change the patterns. How to become a new breed of conscious consumer.

 

Self Assessment Lesson:

My experience with self assessments, over the years, has been to dig into a spot that may not be the most beautiful about myself and determine how I can make some changes. Experience has also taught me that these times are what growing up is all about.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m a full blown grown up on the outside – complete with mortgage payments and my offspring’s sports games to attend. However, on the inside I still feel youthful.

Using the term “big girl panties” with clients has brought humor into a tense situation. But it’s true. I have to Mom myself at times, have a “big girl” talk with the 7 year old in me that would much rather hang out with friends giggling an afternoon away than dealing with the piles of laundry and bills.

How do I know when it’s time to parent myself? Well, that’s the tricky part, right?

Usually the first sign is some sort of tension.

Whether it’s my husband, staring at a laundry room full of piles considering how he’s going to broach the subject ~ or ~ it’s me, feeling the pressure of deadlines approaching and knowing I’ll have to make time to deal with the necessary tasks.

 

Which leads me to the first self assessment step:

Awareness.

It really is much easier, at first, to just ignore the signs. But over time, the tension builds and stressful conversations (or worse, blowouts) occur. And that doesn’t really help anything.

Learning to recognize what the warning signs are, is the first element of any change – shopping habits related or not.

So, how do you become aware?

Take some time to consider what situations seem difficult, where or when does tension / stress begin?

• is it in the store with a spouse that doesn’t want you to shop anymore?
• is it when you arrive home after a day of shopping and you’re feeling the need to hide your loot?
• is it a sinking feeling when you get the credit card bill in the mail?

Once you become aware enough to see some of the things that spark the problems you can move on to the next step.

 

How to use the self assessment information for good:

This next step is a single word as well. But may be the hardest part of the process.

Acceptance.

Accepting that we’re not perfect is a twisted element of our society. Sure many of us say “well, I’m not perfect” but deep down inside we don’t accept that as a fundamental truth about ourselves.

Granted, this is all just my (humble) opinion. Although it has been earned over the years watching client after client come to these places within themselves.

Breaking down. Crying. Finding comfort in knowing they no longer need to pretend. They can begin to adjust their “self talk tapes” that deteriorate their self esteem day after day.

More importantly, allowing ourselves to accept those around us sometimes have a better view of who we are and what we do with it is sometimes a sour pill to swallow. But gulp it down, we can – if the desire is deep enough.

How to begin accepting:

• when someone you love or respect makes an observation, take it under consideration
• forgive yourself for past mistakes, accept yourself (good & bad) from here forward
• have an understanding of what you’d like to change / adjust, pay attention to those encouraging the improvements

 

The final step in this self assessment:

 

Sit with It.

Finding a way to be aware and accepting are just the tools. Actually staying in a head space that forces those tools to be used is the hardest work of all. It is exhausting. It is uncomfortable. But in the end, it is worth it.

 

Self Assessment Challenge of the week:

Figure out how to customize the self assessment lesson to your situation.

• Become aware :: what shopping habits create the most difficult situation?
• Accept your situation :: you cannot undo the past, forgive yourself for previous mistakes and begin the necessary steps to change your shopping habits from here forward
• Utilize the results :: do the hard work then rely on the self assessment results as a compass to help you stay on course as you improve your shopping habits

 

Self Assessment Homework:

remember, homework is an individual choice …

The work this week is all about what’s inside of you, although in order to gather the entire picture requires a fact finding mission.

1. Share this post with someone you trust
2. Ask them to respectfully help you understand what they see in your shopping habits
3. Explain you are only looking for feedback on this ONE topic (no need to recruit criticism elsewhere)
4. Listen to their feedback, consider taking notes (it helps the information feel less hurtful)
5. Evaluate their observations and determine what insights were similar to your own
6. Take action – become aware, accept the entire picture, stay in the uncomfortable space using your tools

Tip: if you know someone else who wants to improve their shopping habits they may be a good person to talk to and possibly a much needed source for support.

Join the conversation throughout the week over on The Mental Clutter Coach Facebook Page:

What do you think of the Weekly Challenge :: Self Assessment of Shopping Habits?

 

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